Vent of Hearing

The Toy Gatekeeper

Jonathon Delacour discusses gatekeeping, as referred to by Dorothea Salo, and points out that exclusion is done when something should be done in specific way. This reminds me of the maxim "If you want something doing, do it yourself", which sometimes seems to be "If you want something doing right, do it yourself".

After a long days play. my daughter has out a variety of her toys. Having a six month old as well means it is very difficult to get her to put something away before playing with something new (thankfully George appears to be getting to the end of the constant attention phase). As we have a limited space and a large number of toys in the house, they have to fit into her cupboard in a specific way. We encourage our daughter to put things away in the evening (it makes a good game), but occasionally she puts things in the wrong box. It is my role to supervise this, whilst my wife give the six month old his final feed. It is just too time consuming to correct her sometimes or even get her to do it at all, so things end up being misplaced (a lego brick in with the Weebles). Nothing major. She'll get them out again the next day anyway.

My wife doesn't quite see it that way, and had a major sort out yesterday. There were still a lot of toys left out. I dared not put her toys away, fearing the backlash if I got it wrong. So, they were left out, and Daddy got told off for them not being put away. I was given a detail explanation of where everything now went.

I'm wondering if my wife is a "frustrated gatekeeper" as she cannot control the task, yet still needs it to be done in done in specific way.