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The acts commenced on this ball of earth: Upon my tongues continual slanders ride,
It feels like my whole life is on hold at the moment, waiting for the birth of number 2. Someone asked what I was doing on such and such a date (basically a drinking session) and I had to explain that I wasn't sure, I'd have to wait until after the birth. Missed football last night again, because of it. Basically, I don't want to do anything. I didn't even want to start a new book in case I'd have to stop in the middle to go to the hospital. That is totally irrational because I often put books down to do things like go to work. I briefly considered taking the book to hospital, but then considered the beating I'd get.
It is also a big struggle to do anything at work as well. I've got two weeks holiday to come after the birth and I don't want to start any new projects until after the holiday. I've just had a review and have a new set of objectives to meet, and am worried that I won't meet some of them the longer I wait.
This morning Gina had a few contractions again, and I got all mentally prepared; call parents, phone the list for who to take Emilia, get bags. No, they were just more practice ones. It doesn't help when Gina goes "oooh" and then looks at me. Then smiles. She is winding me up, definitely.
The news about the Milan skyscraper came over the radio on the way home, and the selfish bastard that I am my first thought was, I hope the new baby isn't born the same day as a major disaster like September 11th. It doesn't help that I'm constantly wired about the birth, and drinking far too much coke and coffee. It quickly became clear it wasn't on the same scale, or even a terrorist act. The pictures were worryingly similar though. This mornings radio had a talk about pensioner drivers and whether they should be made to take a new test.
Gina annoyed me last night, wanting to read her emails in the middle of me doing some site updates. It was at the point where there would have been a big error message running down the middle of the index page (due to castalian not liking dos converted text files I think; I had to cut and paste the code into a new file). And for reasons that are way to complicated to go into, I don't really want her to read this website. She knows about emilia-freeman.com, but I try to keep this site just for me.
What are the chances of Gina ever reading this? Off her own bat, pretty slim. She reads emails and can use a browser and word, but not much else. She isn't a big computer fan. However, we have mutual friends who are very computer literate. I haven't made this site general knowledge to RL friends, just online ones, so, unless I do Gina won't see it. She doesn't know my afe is alias 'Sarabian' despite much pestering over the years, and a search for my real name doesn't even list this site (at least not in the top 500 on google). However, I could find it.
The reasons for all this are far too complex to go into, and most likely not what you think. I would say, but I don't want to start on something like that until after the new baby is born.
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A wiseman once said (Evening Standard journalist, to be more precise :)): "All successful relationships, depend on both partners occasionally doing something in complete defiance of the other one's wishes." I guess your secret website qualifies. :) And I totally agree - it is healthy to keep some little secrets, whatever the reason. :)
Posted by Leia at April 26, 2002 01:21 PMGeorge settles into a pattern, Emilia gets slightly cheekier, I ponder on various things, I watch multiple football games, and read a lot (2)
Lots of work, lack of updates, a decision to make, George is getting fatter and the World Cup starts this week, (2)
George's 4 week birthday and Emilia's reaction to George (0)
It is interesting how two children from the same genetic stock can be so different. Even though he is only... (0)
It is 3am and the only way George will sleep is if I continually walk up and down the living room at a consistent and slow pace. (1)
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