Escape
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10 May 2002
Friday night, the traditional time for drinking and merriment. Well, it is if you are young, free and single. And childless. These days Friday night is stay in and watch TV on subtitles (try Never Mind the Buzzcocks, btw). Except this Friday turns out to be a traditional night after all, as I'm invited out for a curry and am allowed to go.
The MIL is helping with baby sitting duties, Emilia is coping well with a young brother and sleeping through the night like normal, and has been put to bed at 7pm. I change into a shirt and I'm off. I catch a bus, and for a change it is on time and there is a free seat. The journey into town is swift and effortless. This is going to be a *good* evening. However, I've promised myself not to get too drunk (I will have to get up at 7am the next day), and I remind myself not to get carried away.
I meet my friends at the Indian restaurant. We get drinks before sitting down and I'm introduced to a new face, a friend of a friend, Andy and I quickly learn that Fred, the Usually Comatose Paramedic, has taken an instant dislike to him.
At the table I find out why when I sit next to him. When Mark explains who he works for, Andy launches into a diatribe about his problems with Windows Update. Hmm. As the evening progress and the beers increased, I rapidly forgot my own promise not to get carried away.
At some point in the evening, it was decided that we should toast George and a round of port and cigars were ordered. I think this is what contributed to the rather large bill we had to pay at the end. Also, around this time, we had a short-straw competition to see who would kill Andy. Andy, being the sort of person who didn't realise how much he was annoying everyone, and thought we were joking. Actually, we were joking, but you see what I mean.
The bills paid, we stumbled home. Here's a question for you. What do you get if you mix lots of drink, three blokes, a wheelie-bin and a hand?
Fred decided it was a good idea to get in a wheelie-bin.
Mark decided it was a good idea to push him around a bit.
I decided that too.
The wheelie-bin decided that having Fred in it make it top heavy and decided to fall over.
Mark decided that he'd get out of the way.
I decided that too.
I was too late.
The ground decided that it was harder that my hard and made its point. -
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Comments
At least you have nice clean finger nails.
Helen
Posted by Helen at May 17, 2002 07:33 PM
Wanna hear a moan? It's pretty anal.
Right, here goes. I'm surprised Helen didn't mention this :)
"We get drinks before sitting down and I'm introduced to a new face, a friend of a friend, Andy and I quickly learn that Fred, the Usually Comatose Paramedic, has taken an instant dislike to him."
That should be "We get drinks before sitting down and I'm introduced to a new face, a friend of a friend, Andy, and I quickly learn that Fred, the Usually Comatose Paramedic, has taken an instant dislike to him."
See the comma after "Andy"? I had to read it four or five times before I realised that Andy *was* the friend-of-a-friend, rather than that both you and Andy had quickly learned that Fred had taken a dislike to the (unnamed) FOAF.
Sorry, I'll take my moany grammar hat off now. :)
Posted by Aquarius at May 19, 2002 08:51 AM
I think Helen didn't notice because it didn't involve Tesco's :)
Posted by Sarabian at May 20, 2002 11:56 AM
Hand update: Healing nicely, although I got my finger nails slightly dirty mowing the lawn on Saturday.
Posted by Sarabian at May 20, 2002 11:57 AM
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